Step back before you get offended

Colossians 3:12 Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.

Old habits hang around like dirty clothes. You know you have to wash them, but sometimes they just pile up. The Lord has been challenging me to go to the next level of obedience and maturity in my walk with him. I’ve changed quite a bit, I’m not who I used to be, but I’m not where God wants me to be. I have a responsibility as someone who loves the Lord to walk the talk.

Today I was challenged to drop my tendency to get offended. I was pleasantly surprised when I recognized that I was about to fall into my old habit of wanting to take the high road because I’m always right. Offense opens the doors to making irrational decisions, in the heat of the moment, which you will often regret. Offense typically leads to sin. It really is best to realize that you can’t control the actions of others, but you can control how you react.

I stopped myself from escalating the conflict. Instead, I’m taking responsibility for my behavior and stepping up to the expectations that God has for me. I can’t be a baby Christian all my life. I also know my growth isn’t possible, unless the LORD is guiding all my steps.

I choose to forgive, so I can be forgiven.

How do you handle offense? Leave your comments.

Prayer and praise powers Twitter

2 Corinthians 1:4 He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.

I’m in a season of sorrow as I watch my mother slowly start to leave her earthly body. She’s in hospice care. Other key people in my life are also facing serious health issues, and I’ve also had to deal with the “thorns” that I battle.

I am taking care of myself by sharing my burdens with the Lord and with the people who are closest to me. In short, I’m doing all I can humanly do to remain in God’s peace. And most days, I’m amazed at the joy in my heart regardless of my circumstances.

But some days it’s hard…

I feel helpless when Mom’s in pain and I watch her suffer but not complain. All I can do is reassure her that the staff is doing all they can to keep her comfortable and that I love her. And then I cry and my heart breaks and that’s when I feel deep sorrow. I remind myself that Jesus wept (John 11:35). The God who made me understands my human emotions and need for comfort.

Nothing is as powerful as prayer and praise

I love the many people who follow my timeline on Twitter (I’m @BlancaV), so I “tweeted” to the Reverend Patrick L. Adams (@RevPat1), who is a powerful intercessor and encourager, to pray for my Mom and my heavy heart. He jumped into action with encouragement – AND by asking those who follow his ministry to pray for my Mom and me! In turn, those folks also “re-tweeted” the prayer request and hundreds of people were lifting us up in prayer all day and into today – because social media is 24/7. We felt those powerful prayers.

God encourages us through others
If any of you are having trouble, pray. If you are happy, sing psalms. James 5:13

Never doubt the prayer of prayer and praise. My day ended beautifully as I joined in #Tworship praise with another group of Twitter souls who worship together Monday through Friday at 9 p.m. EST with music found on Tworship.com. I found myself encouraging and praying for others as God strengthened me. God’s people are powerful and encouraging through prayer and praise.

We are all connected through the Comforter of our soul. Share your prayers and praise. You made a difference to me and my mom! I love how God works through all of us!

Praise Him!

Face your losses or they will face you

Genesis 5:5 (GW)
⁵ Adam lived a total of 930 years; then he died.

Genesis 9:28-29 (GW)
²⁸ Noah lived 350 years after the flood.
²⁹ Noah lived a total of 950 years; then he died.

Genesis 25:7-8 (GW)
⁷ Abraham lived 175 years.
⁸ Then he took his last breath, and died at a very old age. After a long and full life, he joined his ancestors in death.

Then he (or she) died. Those words have been springing off the pages of my Bible lately. It’s not surprising. My ministry of listening and compassion is with those who are very ill…and…my Mother is at the end of her life. Several people I love dearly are also very ill.

During this season, I’ve had to take stock of my emotions… it’s difficult to watch those you love suffer. I’ve read books and reviewed notes on seminars and courses I’ve taken on grieving since I deal with it in my ministry.  I’ve written about grief and how the Lord has helped me heal so that I could be effective in his purposes for me. I share my experiences because I believe that unresolved grief keeps us from achieving the things that God has called us to do. Now I’m sharing another tool that I found useful.

Loss Graph History

This exercise is a must for all pastoral caregivers. Until we understand how grief works in our lives, it’s difficult to be effective listeners and caregivers for patients, family and friends.  Start your timeline with the year you were born. Add all your losses – for example: deaths, divorces, pet losses, moves, graduations, new job, job loss, empty nest, financial setbacks, retirement – any events that are significant.

Be thoughtful with your loss graph. Once you see the results, take a look at each event to determine if you allowed yourself to grieve. You may be surprised. I’m aware of my losses because I’ve had to deal with them on a professional level for my ministry – through classes and seminars. You may need to talk through your grief with family or a professional. 

Resolving grief removes a huge burden – I know it did for me. As I go on my Mom’s journey, I remind myself that it’s OK to be sad, to take a break, to rest and to run into God’s arms. He rescues me all the time.

When it hurts to care – Psalm 31:7

When it hurts to care – Psalm 31:7

Psalm 31:7 I will be glad and rejoice in your unfailing love, for you have seen my troubles, and you care about the anguish of my soul.

One of God’s gifts to me is the ability to care about and pray for those who are ill. But right now, my mother is at the end of her life, and another key person in my life recently received bad health news. I also follow the Facebook journey of a courageous 12-year old girl, Jessie Rees, who suffered from two inoperable brain tumors. She passed away a few days ago. I am sad.

But it’s interesting that in my sadness, I’ve come to appreciate how God works my faith steps. Before I decided that God’s purpose for me was greater than my own purpose, I had a hard time being close to people because it hurt that they might die or leave me. God opened my understanding (and healed me) so that I could come to terms with that and step into the gifts of compassion he planned for me.

I started to feel that familiar hurt earlier this week after visiting with Mom’s medical team and then learning of the child’s passing. But it’s just like the Lord to order my steps because I returned to a powerful hospital ministry over the weekend. I also realized that I have to lay my burdens on the Lord. I can’t do it on my own.

Whenever you feel like it hurts too much, remember that the Lord cares about the anguish of your soul. Go to him.